


we could not sleep

by courageous_boss



Series: Comfortember 2020 (JATP) [2]
Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Alex is a good friend, Boys Kissing, Comfortember 2020, Gen, Luke Patterson Needs a Hug (Julie and The Phantoms), Platonic Kissing, boys crying, luke gets SAD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:00:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27517261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/courageous_boss/pseuds/courageous_boss
Summary: Luke gets Sad and Alex sits with him through it.
Relationships: Alex & Luke Patterson (Julie and The Phantoms)
Series: Comfortember 2020 (JATP) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2006560
Comments: 6
Kudos: 87
Collections: Comfortember 2020





	we could not sleep

**Author's Note:**

> warning: luke is really sad.

Luke sighed, blowing his hair off his face. It lifted briefly, then flopped miserably against his forehead. It was at an awkward length, too short for his liking but still long enough to fall all over his face. He hated it.

The dark, creeping feeling in his chest was back, sudden and uninviting. He rubbed at it, willing it away. It stayed, building and building, refusing to go away.

He closed his eyes, wrinkled his nose and poofed back into the studio. Neither Alex nor Reggie were there, and it was after two in the morning, so Julie was asleep. Luke settled onto the couch, chest still tight and uncomfortable.

The air was still and stuffy with the garage locked up. It was sticky and warm against Luke’s skin. He laid down, blinking into the dark. His hair fell against his face again, itchy and uncomfortable. He didn’t have the energy to brush it away again, so he just laid there miserably.

A side-effect of being ghosts meant that they didn’t sleep anymore. Luke would have killed for that ability when he’d been alive. Back then, there hadn’t seemed to be enough hours in the day to do everything he wanted to do. There was always one more lyric to add to his notebook, one more fret to master, one more way to launch Sunset Curve into the stardom he knew they deserved.

Now, Luke wished he could just close his eyes and let the hours wash over him. He didn’t know what to do with all the extra hours anymore. There was no Sunset Curve, no deadlines to be missed, no real life to be lived. He had all the time in the world and nothing to do with it.

Briefly, he wondered when Alex and Reggie were. Alex was mostly off with Willie, and Reggie liked going down to the beach. If his chest didn’t feel has heavy as lead, Luke might have joined Reggie. But right now, even thinking about moving made his skin crawl.

Suddenly, the air burned, ringing with something electric. Then, Alex was standing in the middle of the garage, a soft, dopey grin on his face.

Luke smiled before Alex could notice him. There weren’t words big enough to hold how happy he was that Alex had found Willie. It sucked that it had taken death to bring them together, but Luke supposed that it didn’t make much sense focusing on the negatives.

After a moment, Alex saw him on the couch, “Oh, hey Luke.”

“How was Willie?” Luke teased, grinning when Alex blushed.

“Oh, be quiet,” Alex rolled his eyes, cheeks still flaming, “You’re just jealous.”

Luke hummed, the aching in his chest intensifying.

In a weird way, the guessed Alex was right. He was jealous. Or, more accurately, he was lonely.

He missed meeting new people, haggling with managers and making a fool of himself in class. More, he missed his parents.

He missed his dad and his cool, strong voice. He missed how his words would float through the hallways, solid and present and demanding to be heard.

He missed his mom so much he _ached_. He missed her nagging at him to focus on school, he missed her telling him stories from her childhood, he missed the sweet, earnest ring to her voice when she said ‘I love you”. He missed the sound of his own voice saying it back.

Alex frowned, watching Luke clutch desperately at his chest.

This had happened a few times when they’d been younger. Luke’s mind was a strange place – creative and fun and kind – but strange. There’d be times when Luke would get too turned into himself, so far into his thoughts that he'd leave the real world behind and go spiralling.

Alex and Reggie had learned the signs a long time ago. Luke would pull away, refusing to make physical contact. He’d pace around and be full of this awful, nervous energy.

It was an easy enough fix when they caught it early.

Reggie would take Luke to the shop and get some sugar into him. It helped to calm him down in the weirdest way, but it worked. Then, Alex would get them bus tickets and they’d just go riding. It helped to get Luke somewhere new and exciting, not as a distraction really, but more as something new for him to get his brain turning.

Now that they were ghosts, Alex didn’t know where to start. They couldn’t eat anymore, and bus rides would be miserable with all the people walking right through them.

Alex watched Luke fidget, looking miserable and sullen. Luke curled his fingers into his chest, wincing when he pressed hard. Worst of all, Luke didn’t seem to realize what he was doing. He was just digging his fingers into his chest and then flinching in shock at the pain.

_How had he missed Luke getting this bad?_

“Are you okay?” Alex asked, voice heavy with worry.

Luke looked up at the ceiling, avoiding eye contact. With Alex’s concerned eyes on him, he suddenly felt on the verge of tears. His body felt too small to hold him and he was itching all over.

Luke blinked and Alex was suddenly by his side, fretting.

“Luke, hey,” Alex gently took Luke’s hand, pulling it from his chest.

Luke frowned as the pain in his chest lessened. Had he been causing it himself?

“Are you hearing me?” Alex asked, sounding far away.

Luke’s ears felt fuzzy and echoey, but he nodded, flexing his fingers in Alex’s hold.

“I don’t feel so good,” Luke admitted, tears cropping up.

Alex sat on the ground, back against the couch. He kept Luke’s hand held tightly and leaned his head against Luke's leg.

“It hurts Alex,” Luke whimpered.

With Alex’s back turned, it was easy for Luke to let his tears fall. 

“Where?” Alex asked softly.

“Um,” Luke swallowed, “my chest. It hurts a lot... I miss my mom and dad. A lot.”

Alex heard Luke’s voice shake and felt his own eyes turn misty.

“I think about my mom a lot,” Luke confessed. “I broke her heart. I know I did. I’m the worst son.”

“You’re not the worst son,” Alex protested weakly.

He knew there was nothing he could say to change Luke’s mind about this. He knew about Luke’s visits to his parent’s house. He knew that Luke blamed himself for the way they'd died.

“I’m really, really sad Alex. My chest hurts,” Luke said, voice hitching.

He was fully crying now and Alex’s own heart was aching.

Gently, he pressed a kiss to Luke’s knuckles, “I’m sorry.”

Luke sobbed harder, scrambling off the couch to lay beside Alex. Alex guided him to lie down, pillowing Luke’s head on his lap.

Luke craved physical contact, so Alex made sure to never let go of him. He kept holding his hand, pressing soft kisses onto his fingers.

“You’re going to be okay,” he promised.

He rubbed Luke’s chest, gentle in a way Luke never was with himself, “It will stop hurting, I promise.”

Eventually, he figured out that Luke liked him pushing his hair off his face, so he did so, one hand massaging Luke’s head while the other held Luke’s hand tightly. Still, he laid kisses onto Luke’s fingers, promising him that this sorrow would pass.

Slowly, Luke’s tears lessened. His eyes fell shut and his breathing slowed. He wasn’t asleep, Alex knew, but at least he could rest. Alex sat and held him, and he’d stay until he coaxed Luke’s smile out again.

**Author's Note:**

> sorry for any typos! please leave kudos/comments if you enjoyed :)


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